A new year has dawned. The beginning of January is traditionally the time when we resolve to make changes – to wipe the slate clean and start afresh. As the media loves to put it: “New Year, New You”.
As we all know, however, New Year Resolutions are notorious for their inability to survive beyond the end of January. According to Oliver Burkeman, a columnist in the Guardian’s Weekend magazine, there is a very good reason for that: Old You!
He wrote last Saturday: “Old You is the last person you ought to trust when it comes to designing a New You. Consider the facts. For a start, Old You doesn’t currently do any of the things he or she claims will make New You happy and fulfilled. (Would you trust a personal trainer who chain-smoked through your sessions and never worked out? Exactly.) Moreover, Old You doesn’t even seem to like himself or herself very much, otherwise a makeover wouldn’t be on the agenda. Clearly, Old You has some issues. Lastly, Old You probably has a long track record of trying and failing to implement change – and yet you’re going to trust this shifty character with your future? That’s like taking your car to a mechanic who botches the repair job almost every time.”
Amusing though Burkeman’s column is, it is also spot on! We need help from someone other than our fallible selves if we want to bring out real and lasting change.
If you’ve been struggling to find the confidence and resolve to end your marriage for many months or years, then starting 2016 with the silent vow that “this is the year I’ll walk away” is very probably not going to get you much further along the road. Similarly, if you’ve already consulted a High Street solicitor but been left feeling less-than-confident, you’re unlikely to press ahead with the process just because the calendar has changed. What you need is someone’s help – and by “someone” I mean an real expert who can support you, advise you, reassure you, ameliorate your fears and give you the self-belief that change is the right thing for you and that your life afterwards will be better than it is now.
That expert may be a specialist divorce lawyer. And all you have to do is pick up the phone and have one conversation.
At Benussi & Co, divorce, separation and their attendant issues are all we do, so we are as expert in the field as it is possible to be. As well as our legal expertise, we are adept at helping clients cope with the associated problems and emotions that people experience when they are going through a marital break-up. From many decades in the business, we know that however bleak, frightening and unsettling divorce or separation might look at the start of the process, there really is light – and a lot of it – at the end of the tunnel. We help clients get there sooner, more calmly and with the best possible outcome.
So this New Year, forget about struggling to invent a New You. Take the Old You to a specialist lawyer.